Sermon Text: Matthew 10:34–42
Date: June 28, 2026
Event: Proper 8, Year A

Matthew 10:34–42 (EHV)

“Do not think that I came to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. 35For I came to turn a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. 36A man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.

37“Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. 38Whoever does not take up his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. 39Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

40“Whoever receives you receives me, and whoever receives me receives him who sent me. 41Whoever receives a prophet because he is a prophet will receive a prophet’s reward. Whoever receives a righteous man because he is a righteous man will receive a righteous man’s reward. 42Whoever gives one of these little ones even a cup of cold water to drink because he is my disciple—Amen I tell you—he will never lose his reward.”

Who Is Your Priority?

When doing counseling, especially counseling that involves personal relationships, I have found it useful to have the people involved make lists of the relationships in their lives. It’s almost alarming sometimes to see all the different places and situations where our lives intersect with someone else’s life. But then you take the list of relationships and prioritize them. Which ones are the most important (and thus should receive the majority of our mental and emotional energy), and which ones are less fundamental? This can help us to identify where, perhaps, our priorities have gotten a bit out of whack. If someone realizes that their job outranks their family, that’s likely a problem. If someone notes that their children are a higher priority than their spouse, that will probably bring other difficulties.

Of course, our priorities are always changing, right? The planned all-nighter to launch that big project at work means that family takes a back seat for a day, while the family vacation means that the work email and phone calls are turned off. An emergency call that one of our members is in the hospital may disrupt some family activity, but I’m certainly not going to spend time dealing with a cold-call cleaning service quote request when I’m spending time with the kids.

Priorities shift and change, but Jesus reminds us that there is one priority in our lives that should never change: our relationship with God. He should always be number one in our lives. But how often is he? Jesus does nothing in this section of Matthew’s Gospel but restate the First Commandment: you shall have no other gods (Exodus 20:3). If we could keep that commandment perfectly, we would never sin, because we would always put God and his will above our own. However, every time we sin, we also break this commandment because, in that moment, we take what we want and make it more important than what God wants.

Who is your priority? Our gut reaction might be, “My spouse! My children! My parents! My friends!” Those are clearly all massively important relationships in our lives. It would be a struggle to function without them, and clearly, we reap tremendous blessings from them. But Jesus’ words are startling and alarming. He asks the question, “If push came to shove, who would win? Me or them?” “Do not think that I came to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I came to turn a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. A man’s enemies will be the members of his own household. Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.”

How often do we think of Jesus as the peace-bringer? How often does the Bible itself say that Jesus is a peace-bringer? Then why does Jesus say he has come to bring a sword, not peace? The difference is where you’re looking for that peace. The angels proclaimed to the shepherds that their message of a baby in a manger would bring peace on earth and goodwill to all people (Luke 2:8-14). But that peace was not between human beings on this earth. In fact, Jesus notes that his work may actually produce more controversy and conflict than peace between people.

We don’t have to spend too much time studying history to see this bear out. People have responded poorly, even murderously, to the message of Jesus. Even more alarmingly, people have used Jesus as an excuse to behave poorly and murderously. From the early church to the crusades to the Reformation, Christianity has been at the center of conflict practically from the moment Jesus ascended into heaven.

Jesus invokes language from the prophet Micah to show what that conflict might look like on a more personal level. For I came to turn a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. A man’s enemies will be the members of his own household (see Micah 7:6). Perhaps you were blessed to grow up in a household that was totally committed to the truth of the Bible and sharing Jesus with the world. But many do not have that blessing. We likely all have people, at least in our extended families, who recoil at the very mention of “Jesus” or even “religion.” They just don’t want to hear it, and because they don’t, they lash out at us with scorn and derision or simply ignore us.

And so often we find ourselves quiet; we avoid religion at the family gathering to avoid starting any conflict. After all, we don’t want to upset or hurt anyone’s feelings, so the less we wear our faith on our sleeves, the less likely we are to have a problem and the more likely things will go on in relative peace. I say “relative” because ignoring a problem is not fixing it. A cease-fire amongst warring nations where animosity and hate still simmer or boil will not last long; being quiet only brings a surface-level, very temporary peace.

If we shy away from religious conflict in our family, is it about our family members or about us? Are we really worried that what we think or say might hurt someone else, or are we mostly worried that they might say or do something that would hurt us? Is our family really the priority over (and sometimes against) Jesus? Or is it perhaps ultimately that we have made a little idol to worship, one that we see every time we glance in the mirror? If we’re honest, we’ll admit that we often shy away from the conflict Jesus predicted, not because we care about other people’s feelings, but because we simply don’t want to go through the hardships.

And thus, we show ourselves to be people who love our family, or perhaps more likely, ourselves, more than Jesus. We don’t make him the priority because we don’t want to. We avoid testifying because we’re scared of the fallout. We avoid living our faith because we don’t want the conflict or mockery. We try to keep that fake peace around as much as possible, all the while knocking Jesus down the priority list, or perhaps off the list entirely.

For as many times as you and I have not made Jesus the priority, he has always prioritized us. He made his Father’s will more important than his own, even when it meant pain, misery, and death. In fact, his priority was to go to his death because we have such messed-up priorities. So he goes, not caring about the torment that would befall him if it meant rescuing us from hell, which it did. Jesus’ work may bring conflict to our personal, human relationships, but it also brought us peace with God, a relationship that is far more important than any human relationship we have.

Now, because we were and are his priority, and because he’s made peace between himself and us, Jesus has enabled us to make him our priority. We’re no longer locked into the selfish, sinful way of thinking. We are free to give God the highest priority in our lives; we are free to put others’ needs ahead of our own.

Along with that comes some trouble. Jesus talks about us taking up our cross and following him. The cross at that time had no positive connotation. There was no message of joy and forgiveness in the cross. The cross was only an instrument of unimaginable torture and eventually death. There was nothing good about the cross, yet Jesus tells us to take up our cross, embrace the hardships in our lives, and follow him.

In following him, while worldly speaking we may have a difficult go of it, eternally speaking, it is nothing but joy. Jesus says, “Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” If our focus is on our own lives and what makes us happy, we toss our crosses aside and ignore the way Jesus directs us. But if we count this life as worth very little compared to eternity, if we embrace the suffering we endure as a Christian as a natural consequence of our faith, if we seek to follow Jesus no matter the cost, we have found real life. Because real life is not found in the size of our TV, or the quality of our food, the balance in our bank account, or the number of friends we have, how well we get along with our family, or our influence in the community. Real life is found in Jesus. Because the life that Jesus gives is not fleeting like the stuff of this life; the life that Jesus gives is the flawless perfection of eternity.

Cherishing that life, that gift, that, as Jesus says here, reward, means having different priorities. You’re no longer only concerned about yourself and what will happen to you. You’re concerned about staying devoted to Jesus, helping others, and sharing that message. Maybe that means encouraging your pastor or other called workers in our church body and sharing in the joy and struggles of their work—sharing in a prophet’s reward. Maybe it means helping a fellow Christian in difficult times by encouraging them with reminders of the love of their Savior, and, at the same time, finding encouragement yourself—sharing in a righteous man’s reward. We show love and kindness to all people because we know that our Savior has shown the ultimate love for them. So if we can do anything for anyone, especially our fellow believers, be it offering a cup of cold water or anything else, we do it, because we know our reward is not here on earth, it’s in heaven with our Savior forever.

Jesus is our priority at all times because he’s the only one who can actually help us. No matter how much I may want to find a way out of a problem, especially the problem of my sin, there’s not going to be any way to do it. But, when I see my earthly life as unimportant compared to eternity, and I truly let Jesus take over and fix every problem—especially, again, the problem of my sin—then I have found my life despite the world’s opinion that I’ve actually lost it. When Jesus is the one in charge, when Jesus is the one who is rescuing me—rescuing you—from the worthless life of sin we lead on our own, then we have found life, real life.

You have the life, you have the reward, because Jesus is your priority. He will be there to take care of the conflict that comes as a result of you living your faith. And no matter what happens, the forgiveness that Jesus gives cannot and will not be taken from you. You are his, and he is yours. Thanks be to God! Amen.

Soli Deo Gloria